lunakat said: I think you are missing my point. I'm not saying everyone has a choice. My sister is straight and wouldn't be comfortable dating a woman, ever.
But some people do. And I'm just saying- there is nothing wrong with making that choice. The whole "we can't help it" argument just caters to the mainstream notion that it's wrong. But it's not wrong. It sort of pisses me off that we have to cater to that negative, prejudiced fallacy.
It pisses me off too. But the fact remains that the notion that it's purely choice to be non-heterosexual is the backbone of the argument for why such non-heterosexuals are "abominations" and to justify why we should be disenfranchised, ridiculed, bullied, denied the ability to life an authentic life, and in the worst case, actually beaten or killed. So we can't dismiss the importance of driving home the message that no, you can't just choose your sexuality willy-nilly.
But of course, like most things (maybe even more-so) human sexuality is very, very gray and is a fluid thing. In reality we all fall somewhere on a spectrum and in light of that there is some choice involved. And I fully agree that there's nothing wrong choosing a consenting sexual relationship with another consenting adult -- of any sex or gender.
But we're nowhere near close to making that argument with the masses at large. Baby steps.