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Feb Spam Month Thread

TrollHammer

Well, so here we have a conglomeration of gooey, slimy, greasy SPAM... Few know what it's made of, and it appears that the only rule is that it has to be a chaotic mess...



Well, in this case, we have a thread. The only rules are ANYTHING IS ALLOWED, as long as it doesn't break the site rules.



Pictures, nonsense, poems, Odes to Spam, silly names you called your imaginary friend over the years, whatever. Just try to make this thread as long as possible!



Kickoff is TODAY, 2-1-12, and I'll be checking posters' post counts through the month. There might be a prize to the poster that increases thier post count the most!



No score board, but extra credit if yoor post is Spam related.



Have fun!Thumbs_up

RedheadEmber

SPAM!

TrollHammer

Awesome fun font sizing, Redhead! Happy Holidays!

RedheadEmber

You too!

TrollHammer

Ok, ill try...
wheeeee...

TrollHammer

SPAM MONTH BEGINS TODAY!!!!



Have fun spamming, post often, post now, post whatever, whenever. I'll be putting up some pictures in a little bit.

RedheadEmber

Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay Yay

jeb

So I'm grading my student's papers, and I already hate it because a) I only taught this class once, and that was 2 years ago, so I don't really remember how the labs are going to go and what to emphasize or warn them about, and b) I don't really have a feel for what the students know and what kind of background they are coming in with or what they are getting in the lecture part of the class, so it's really annoying.



Anyway, I'm grading the papers and I realize that 3 out of the 12 points on this quiz I made up are for significant figures on their calculations and I'm like, that's way too much! So now I feel like it was just a badly made exam, and my students are going to hate me and think I'm a big sham and don't know anything.



Of course, I'm probably way overestimating how much my students care about me anyway. All they want is a good grade, not to really learn anything. (Some of them anyway.



And I'm in a bad mood because I have this really bad heartburn that I've had for like 2 weeks and it is really driving me crazy. So much so that I was worried that my cancer was back and it was the result of tumors growing in my chest, so I went to see the doctor (not my usual one) and he was like "No. Dude, take some antacid." (Well, not really. The guy's like 70 and has the bedside demeanor of House. Almost the whole exam consisted of rapid-fire yes/no questions like he was afraid I might actually talk to him. He's the doctor that initially diagnosed by cancer. I quite like him.) Now I feel like I was really stupid. And I was so worried about seeing the doctor that I sent out a really stupid email obsessing over something that I realize now doesn't even matter, and I wish I could just call the email back, but of course I can't, and I'd like write another one saying just ignore the first one but I'm afraid if I do that, I'll appear even more crazy than I already do, and really freak out the people I sent it to. So now I keep checking my email for a response so I can say, hey, it was no big deal.



It's so cloudy today but it's weird because its been really warm and all the plants are budding out but I know it's going to get cold again. I hope it isn't like last year when, just as the wisteria was blooming, it snowed and froze and killed all the blossoms. And even though it's so warm, the house is still freezing. Why is it always freezing in here?



And now my arm hurts from typing. On a bright note, though, I found out what was causing the rash of migraines I had this summer. It was the "Who want's to be a millionaire" game on Facebook. I think it was do to some weird graphic they use, affects me like flashing lights in video games affects epileptics. But at least now I have an idea what caused it, I can hopefully avoid it again. Because I would hate to have a migraine while I'm teaching and give my students another reason to think I'm an incompetent bore.



See how I brought that back around? Pretty cool, isn't it? Hello?

jeb

Also, I just read an article stating that McDonald's is no longer using the "pink slime" in its burgers. Made me wonder, is "pink slime" spam?

TrollHammer

Quote:






Whoo Hoo!!! Gonna bring out the banana?

TrollHammer

Quote:


So I'm grading my student's papers, and I already hate it because a) I only taught this class once, and that was 2 years ago, so I don't really remember how the labs are going to go and what to emphasize or warn them about, and b) I don't really have a feel for what the students know and what kind of background they are coming in with or what they are getting in the lecture part of the class, so it's really annoying.



Anyway, I'm grading the papers and I realize that 3 out of the 12 points on this quiz I made up are for significant figures on their calculations and I'm like, that's way too much! So now I feel like it was just a badly made exam, and my students are going to hate me and think I'm a big sham and don't know anything.



Of course, I'm probably way overestimating how much my students care about me anyway. All they want is a good grade, not to really learn anything. (Some of them anyway.




In a way, you can't really blame them (even though the choice is their's to make on how and what they learn in the end): When the goal of nearly any education system in modern society is to get a blanket paper that depends on pass or fail, and the next rung of the system or employment bases entry on the existance of that piece of paper, it's hard to get enthusiastic over the true meaning behind it.



I learned far more than my peers in all my years of schooling, and I'd say I retained more of what I learned, however, if you look at my grades over the years you'd wonder why I didn't just drop out. Yet, at the same time, I easily confused those in the "graduating top ten" when I would talk about something practical. Ask them what a brand name theorm was, and they'd recite it by rote, but ask them what it was useful for and they'd look at you funny, like it was an alien concept that information should be useful in any way.



The comment kept coming up when I was in school: "what the heck are we goign to use this for anyway?" and it's true, there's generally no everyday use for f(x)=(x-1)^2, at least in the manner of thinking in these terms, however, I use math, geometry, trigonometry, science, history, reading, writing... everything heavily every day in some form when it comes down to it. When I build an enclosure for a dodad and want to make sure the lights and buttons look pretty, I have several ways to go about it: I can array 7 lights across a 10" front and space them at an inch and leave an inch margin on each side, then take the 6 buttons and either line them up with their corrisponding light (if applicable), or space them 1.25" apart and have a clean look that matches the lights, as far as astetics go, and do this in my head. OR, if the enclosure has a wierd increment of size requiring me to pull out the calculator, or I don't have a ruler, or there's some other complexity to the project, guess what? I can simply figure out how many segments of whatever I need to do, visualize a reasonable breakdown of spacing (say I have 4 lights and 13 switches, each 5/8" wide on average, and my box is only 9-10" wide, there's not enough room for them to all go in one row), then use whatever I have around as an equivlant for a compass to set up spacing for whatever I decide matches the clearance needed for each item. Doesn't matter if I'm trying to set up a page for cartooning, making a wooden toy for my 2 year old, trying to figure out how if I can finish off reading a book by a certain time based on how much is left... math is everywhere. I think we would have had a lot more of my peers (and me as well) learn things more practically, if we were shown how things like equasion manipulation can help us on a daily basis instead of flogging us when a sketch of an archane graph isn't perfectly accurate due to a microscopic muscle spasm not connecting the plot line and +y inf.



Basically, I'm comiserating with you because I know what it was like to go through a highly disordered and confused education system that had half the teachers putting in time (treating it like babysitting. Their words, no less!), and the other half, like you, actually caring if the students get something out of your effort, but having to fight the inertia induced by the babysitters. There is a part of me that wants to teach technical subjects like material science, electronics, computer programming... but I know I would make a "horrible" teacher, either inadvertantly grading "too hard" or getting frustrated with kids looking at shop class being an 'easy grade'.



I used to teach swim lessons and got in trouble many times for bucking the system. When I went through swim lessons, if you couldn't meet the criteria for passing a level, you didn't pass. Period. The next teacher was not going to want to backtrack and reteach something a kid should have learned already and hold the whole class up while doing so. I started teaching the upper levels and started getting kids that couldn't meet two levels down, and could barely catch them up to the level before by the end of the "course"... and the parents and other staff wondered why I wasn't passing them. Lets see here... Your kid wouldn't put his head underwater to blow bubbles and I'm suppose to be grading them on how they dive. Your kid doesn't know crawl stroke and I'm supposed to pass them when they are supposed to tread water for 5 minutes by the end of the course... The next class is beginning lifesaving, the starter for becoming a lifeguard, and your kid can't perform any stroke to propel themselves the width of the pool? "we're just babysitters, quit taking it so seriously! Just pass them and make the parents happy." Sorry, I dont work that way.



Quote:


And I'm in a bad mood because I have this really bad heartburn that I've had for like 2 weeks and it is really driving me crazy. So much so that I was worried that my cancer was back and it was the result of tumors growing in my chest, so I went to see the doctor (not my usual one) and he was like "No. Dude, take some antacid." Now I feel like I was really stupid. And I was so worried about seeing the doctor that I sent out a really stupid email obsessing over something that I realize now doesn't even matter, and I wish I could just call the email back, but of course I can't, and I'd like write another one saying just ignore the first one but I'm afraid if I do that, I'll appear even more crazy than I already do, and really freak out the people I sent it to. So now I keep checking my email for a response so I can say, hey, it was no big deal.



That was quite the scare. Im sure it'll work out. In away, you'll know a little better whatkind of friends you have.

Quote:


It's so cloudy today but it's weird because its been really warm and all the plants are budding out but I know it's going to get cold again. I hope it isn't like last year when, just as the wisteria was blooming, it snowed and froze and killed all the blossoms. And even though it's so warm, the house is still freezing. Why is it always freezing in here?



We have had that problem as well. Two years ago trees didnt have any leaves below about 20ft, and many died. They MIGHT be back to normal this year.

Quote:


And now my arm hurts from typing. On a bright note, though, I found out what was causing the rash of migraines I had this summer. It was the "Who want's to be a millionaire" game on Facebook. I think it was do to some weird graphic they use, affects me like flashing lights in video games affects epileptics. But at least now I have an idea what caused it, I can hopefully avoid it again. Because I would hate to have a migraine while I'm teaching and give my students another reason to think I'm an incompetent bore.



See how I brought that back around? Pretty cool, isn't it? Hello?







Nice segway! Some kids will think what they want to, because they have to be there and you're an authority figure, the others should want to think better of you as they look up to you. It'll work out.

TrollHammer

Quote:


Also, I just read an article stating that McDonald's is no longer using the "pink slime" in its burgers. Made me wonder, is "pink slime" spam?







hmm.... perhaps a highly refined spam, like Spamshake!



Funny thing, I didn't really worry about what mcdonalds used after hearing they were clearcutting the amazon to raise cattle. Arby's on the other hand.... well, this is what I was told by former employees...



You take this powdery mix, and add water. Pour it into a large bag. Squeeze out all the air bubbles.



Stick the bag in a freezer overnight.



Peel the bag off of the lump of mixed powder, stick it on a rotissary.



Cook to an internal temperature of (I don't remember what)



Slice and sell as roast beef, however it'll have a lot higher fat and salt content than normal roast beef, but no one will care.




No wonder I can't get roast beef to shave that thin and hold together....

jeb

Quote:




In a way, you can't really blame them (even though the choice is their's to make on how and what they learn in the end): When the goal of nearly any education system in modern society is to get a blanket paper that depends on pass or fail, and the next rung of the system or employment bases entry on the existance of that piece of paper, it's hard to get enthusiastic over the true meaning behind it.





Well, I think it's having that exact attitude that's the problem. So many of my students just see the class as something they have to check off in order to get to their goal. For the most part I teach chemistry to people who don't see their future career as using chemistry. I can't tell how many times a student, at the end of the year, will say "I was sooo close to getting a C, can't you just give it to me? I don't need to know chemistry anyway."



My response is



1 - Thanks, way to validate my life's work

2 - If you don't need it, why have we been wasting the past four months? Somebody must have thought it important you know this stuff.

3 - If you're going into the nursing program, I hope you're never calculating my medication doses.



but most importantly



4 - Yes, this is a hurdle to go through to get your diploma, certificate, whatever you are here for. But when someone looks at that piece of paper saying you passed my class, it's not really saying that you know chemistry. It says that you were able to be given an assignment and get it completed in a timely manner. And, if I've done my job well, you have picked up some reasoning skills that will be applicable to whatever future jobs you do.



I totally empathize with your swimming class experience. I teach at a community college, so my "kids" are anywhere from 18-60, and for the most part, they are the result of an educational system that was more interested in having high graduation rates than making sure any actual learning was done, so I spend valuable time saying things like "This is your book. THIS is the table of contents. THIS is the index. You can look up things like this..." Nuh_uh

jeb

Quote:




hmm.... perhaps a highly refined spam, like Spamshake!




Yum, spamshake! Laugh



Quote:




You take this powdery mix, and add water. Pour it into a large bag.





Sounds like the same stuff, "mechanically separated meat" I think they call it, only dehydrated.

RedheadEmber

Quote:




Whoo Hoo!!! Gonna bring out the banana?







Unfortunately the banana isn't a part of the default icons for this forum any longer...



I ish too leeezeee to find it!Deal

jeb

Last month, the TV game show "Jeopardy" had online try-outs. So I registered and took the online test. Now I'm waiting to see if I did well enough from them to call me in for in-person tryouts. I had to pick which city I wanted to go for the try-out, but of course, there was nothing close-by.

One option was Cleveland, and I thought about it, because about 80% of my family lives near Cleveland. But then again, about 80% of my family lives near Cleveland, so I chose Sacramento. I've watched the show "The Mentalist" a couple of times, and it's supposed to take place in Sacramento, so I thought it might be nice. Also, my parents lived there, so there is that connection.

I don't think they'll call, but really my biggest concern has been, if they do call and I end up being on Jeopardy, what nice little anecdote will I be able to give them for the portion when Alex talks to the contestants. I actually hate that part and have no idea what to offer.

TrollHammer

You can always try making some jab about teasing students with the chemical potential to change their world, but no matter how many hydrogen balloons you ignite in the front of the classroom they simply refuse to grasp the basics....

I was the kid in class that got a lot more out of high school chem than I should have. For extra credit I built a periodic table with samples of each element. I collected around... A hundred or so? Wow, been a while and cant remember.

Then I went on to test out a bar of metal I found laying around. It turned out to be a 2" by 12 inch bar of pure cadmium. One more element to add to the table.

Tantilum had an interesting story. I decided to scavange it from capacitors (being an elecronics guy this was an obvious choice), but the teacher wanted me to have as pure of elements as possib....

After spending two hours trying to neutralize aqua regia and only finding bleached epoxy as a result (and the tantulum carbide untouched), the teacher decided it was good enough. He didnt want to order the fluric acid required to mix with that mixture, as it was the only thing that would dissolve tantulum carbide, we relaized after reading.

Many stories, all fond. Part of me wants to get back into it. Perhaps organic chem this time (too many other interests for jow, though.)

jeb

Well, that's disturbing, as all elements with an atomic number over 83 are radioactive to some degree (although, that didn't stop them from being used in a number of children's toys in the '50s), not to mention the several more that are extremely reactive. And your teacher was right to stay away from the hydrofluoric acid, that's pretty nasty stuff.



You might find this link interesting:



http://periodictable.com

RedheadEmber

OI!



I thought this was the spamfest!

That looks suspiciously like a proper debate! What is this???

jeb

And now for something completely different...

This one's going out to you, Red!

Your red scarf matches your eyes
You close your cover before striking
Your father had the shipfitter's blues
Loving you has made me BANANAS!

RedheadEmber

Yay



I got a poem!

jeb

Actually, it's a song my mom used to sing.

RedheadEmber

Oh!



Hey! Can I talk here? I'm Anne's (Or TCG for This Crazy Girl, as I like to call her) dæmon. Yeah, like from His Dark Materials, only incorporeal, sort of like an inner voice... My names Samo, and I'm settled as a cape dwarf chameleon.



Hope you guys will be okay with Samo joining in here sometimes...

TrollHammer

Plenty of room, Samo!

Well, had some fun in the mud, and not so much fun being sick, but oh well.

Watching old wierd movies.

RedheadEmber

What were you doing in the mud?



Cool!

jeb

In the RED MUD!

Sorry, flashback to my party days, listening to the B-52s.

Here's the song I was listening to today:

When she wakes it seems so shady
she remembers she's a lady
but could it be that maybe
she was having lots of fun

She can see she's wearing leather
in her navel there's a feather
she just has to close her eyes
and give a smile, her prayer begun

She says "Life I embrace you
I will honor and disgrace you
please forgive if I replace you
You see, I'm going through some pain

But now I see clearly
and the dawn is coming nearly
although I'm human and it's early
I swear I'll never forget again."

Blues Traveller

RedheadEmber

Guten Tag meine Freunde!

jeb

Buenos Dias, Amiga!

RedheadEmber

Moín!

TrollHammer

Moshi moshi!

Mucho burrito, fajita, chimichanga.

RedheadEmber

Bing!

Bong!

Bang!



Chicki!

Chicki!

Chang!



Snip!

Snap

Snong



Fling!

Flang!

Flong!

TrollHammer

Chika chika BOOM! chika chika chika BOOM!

BOOM BOOM chika chika BOOM BOOM chika

tink tink

*thud*

RedheadEmber

SPOINK!

TrollHammer

He said as the superhero bounded over the bridge....

TrollHammer

TWO DAYS LEFT!!!

RedheadEmber

AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT SPAM MONTH BEING OVER!!!!